Art Decade II

Yves. Everyone has left now. Police came up to us and asked us questions, I didn't have any answers, no one did. The fire went out pretty quickly, the source was supposedly a gas leak- a reasonable conclusion due to the age of the building but as they wheeled him away I saw Anton mouthing 'bullshit' at me. Christie is nowhere and I don't want to think about the real reason for this.
The sun is starting to go down, we've spent all day in this ridiculous situation and it's still freezing. Shirley has taken the girl away and Cassie and Anton have gone with the ambulance. Deciding we've probably watched the outside of the charred building for quite enough time now, I get up, attempting to pull Gabriel with me. I call for a cab at the end of the road and when we're back at my flat he's still holding my hand and hasn't said a word. He sits down on the sofa and proceeds to stare into space.
-Tea?
Turning slowly toward me, he looks as shocked as he should be to hear my voice for the first time in this long.
-Please.
I sit down on the arm chair opposite him and the scene reminds me of the first days I was here, when we'd sit awkwardly on sofas being incredibly grateful to be holding cups as a distraction from the static atmosphere.
-Do you know what happened?
-It depends.
He gives me a sideways look, the first time he's looked at me properly all day.
-How much do you know?
His eyes leave my face and he returns to looking straight ahead. When he speaks it's weirdly monotonous.
-Shirley told me what Christie did to you, I guessed what Christie did to Cassie and I don't think I want to know what Christie did to that girl. I don't know what he did to Anton, either. And I don't know where he is now. Which is a shame, because I do know that I want to hurt him.
I smile at this because I swear there's nothing else to do.
-I know pretty much the same things.
When I close my eyes I can see everything that's unfolded in the past twenty four hours and it physically hurts me.
-I'm so sorry, Gabriel.
-What for?
-Last night with Christie-
-Shirley said it wasn't you.
-I don't see how that- I didn't...I should have known, I shouldn't have even allowed him to touch me, shouldn't have let him speak to me...
-You couldn't have possibly known. If anything it was my fault for not realising he was that...angry, or that insane.
He looks a lot like someone who blames themselves for something right now, staring furiously at his hands around the teacup.
-I..think it's probably healthier for both of us if we just decide it wasn't either of our faults.
Long pause. I like the way Gabriel looks when he's accepting I'm right about something. It's not like he'd ever tell me I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure he has some sort of internal struggle about matters like that. He cocks his head to one side, looking at me, and when the corners of his mouth turn up slightly I feel supremely relieved.
-I agree. Why are you sitting over there?
I don't really get given a chance to give a reason, as he moves to one side of the sofa motioning beside him. In actual fact I'm usually sitting over here, it seems more logical to use the space but as I sit down beside him and he puts down his cup to curl one arm over my shoulders and the other hand in mine I'm pretty sure he feels the need to have me as close as possible right now. His possessive motions in a non-public environment are so well-placed, I can completely understand where he's coming from.
-I hate knowing that Christie even touched you.
-So do I, Gabriel, believe me!
-Sorry, I didn't mean to...
-No, it's fine. You know, we should probably catch up with everyone else quite soon. We should make sure they're all okay. And Hanne...we never said good bye to Hanne. She won't have left yet, will she?
-No, I think there's still time...
-Good, we'll go round there now.
Gabriel doesn't exactly look in a fit state for going out and seeing people, but I want to make sure Hanne sees Cassie before she goes. Or any of us, for that matter. We're pretty much all involved in this stuff by association so it's definitely a bad idea for her to not know about it. As I get up, I see that Gabriel is just watching me, energy gone and a look of strange wondering in his eyes. I kneel down in front of him to take his drained face in my hands.
-We're going out to fix everything. We can make everything fine, how it was before. I promise, we'll go out, we'll come back, and everything will be fine.
-Everything was perfect before. It couldn't have happened any other way, it had to break. He had to destroy it.
He's so worried looking now I'm actually kind of nervous myself. I shake it off, because a section of my house rules of my head tells me that we've got to have at least one stable person present at all times- when that rule is broken, things happen like last night. Which is not good. Because of this, I pull Gabriel's lips to mine, feeling him relax into me, and when I let him go his eyes are still closed. I can't repress the sigh from my voice as I try to pick things up again.
-It doesn't matter if it's not perfect, Gabriel. It will be fine, it will be here, with you, and that's pretty much perfect for me.
That is a truly dreadful thing to ever say out of context but it seemed like what Gabriel needed to hear.
-Yes. Quite. Absolutely. But...never say that again, Yves.
He's laughing, which is a vast improvement. He kisses me, still laughing, finally getting up from the sofa. From the way he leaves me feeling ever so slightly invisible as he walks purposefully towards his coat I'm pretty sure things are back to normal inside his head. It's almost a nice revelation to be having.

Anne. I'm not running from this, I'm just following what I'm pretty sure is a transvestite but introduced his/herself as Shirley home for a cup of tea to calm the nerves, supposedly. I'm convinced that everything that just happened was my imagination because it was simply too odd to watch a fire engine, an ambulance and a police van driving off in tandem from a crime scene that might possibly have been my fault. I desperately miss not caring about anything as I think about how Anton and Cassie looked being taken into the ambulance, Cassie hooked up to various scary-looking things and Anton just looking a complete wreck not quite managing to make actual noises when the police spoke to him but finding the energy to shoot me coolly accusing looks that I should probably just accept.
Shirley is flustered and marching pretty purposefully in front of me, looking up every now and then like a nervous meerkat. She texts someone incessantly when she's not inspecting her surroundings, when her phone actually rings she seems to jump a little but gives an audible sigh of relief as she answers.
-Sal, where are you? I don't know what's going on...Christie, no- no I didn't- I mean, Cassie and Anton, they've gone to the hospital. Should we go to the hospital?
I watch her chew her red laquered fingernail.
-Yes, yes okay. I'll meet you there...can you try and get hold of Hanne? I can't seem to contact- yes, yeah they're fine. They left, they're okay. Yes. Okay, I will. Bye, love.
She turns to me, the look of panic never having left her face for a second. She attempts to repress the expression as she speaks to me, trying to manipulate her face into a smile, but it doesn't quite work, her lipsticked mouth is a wonky line.
-Change of plan...I'm going to the hospital now. Do you want to...to see...
-Do you think it would be appropriate?
-I don't know, I mean...oh god.
She's stifling back tears, it's only now that I realise how this must look from her perspective. She has no context for this entire situation and has just seen her friend after being attacked by who I assume was another of her friends, and yet another friend still choking on smoke from an explosion said friend has got to have orchestrated. On top of this, I've no idea what's going on with Yves and Gabriel who must have had something to do with it all to have ended up in that place at all, never mind for Christie to have specifically instructed me to tell Yves that it was all Gabriel...oh god, the enourmity of it all catches up on me and I almost choke, but Shirley looks a lot more fragile than I so I offer my arm and decide to go with her.
-You could use the company, right?
She nods folornly. I'm pretty grateful she's the kind of person who carries tissues in their handbags because I haven't the first idea what to do with people who cry. I think it's probably best to just continue resolutely onwards and hopefully she'll feel better soon.
-Thanks.
-I'm sure they'll be fine, Cassie and Anton. Anton was pretty much fine, and Cassie's survived more than this.
-That's not what I'm worried about.
Her face hardens, she looks darkly at me.
-What I want to know is why you're here. What does Christopher mean to you? How do you know those two anyway?
I can't help but laugh as I think of the only reasonable way of putting all of this into words.
-Christie broke into my house last month when I was unconscious. He claimed to be saving me and then he got me to help him break into Cassie's flat.
She lets out a very long sigh.
-How unexpected...yet how horribly predictable. Then what?
-Then he made us help him get money off various people and run a lot. That was all in one night, then I didn't see him until yesterday evening.
-Funny, none of us had seen him for a month either.
-So...he just disappeared. Does he...have any hobbies or anything? I mean, do you have any idea what he might have been doing for that time?
-I'm not sure I want to know. That's the thing though, none of us know very much about him. We don't know about any of his 'hobbies'. It's not that unusual for him to apparently vanish off the face of the earth for any amount of time...but what is unusual is the rest of it. It just seems so vicious, so...planned. Like he knew, for that month, that we were all going to be here, you- you. Why were you here today? What did he do last night, why did he make you come here?
-He came to my house and got me to go with him. I was bored, he knew everything about me, I barely thought about it. You have to realise that I had absolutely no idea until this morning what he was actually capable of.
She turns around to me suddenly, stopping walking.
-Then why did you lie?
-What?
-You lied. You lied to Yves, you said it was Gabriel.
-How could you possibly-
-I saw. I saw, Anne, I was watching. Why did you do that? What did he do to you?
I don't think there's much point in lying. I suppose I owe these people some amount of the truth of the situation.
-He offered me money. That was it. Disappointing, yes, but I honestly-
-Honestly what, thought it was worth it?
-I honestly didn't know he was going to do that. He told me nothing, I had no idea what was going on, I told you. I wouldn't have-
-You wouldn't have taken the money?
-No, I mean- yes, I wouldn't have taken the money if I'd known. I was going to say I wouldn't have stayed if I knew what was going on. If I knew what I'd done- come on, would you stay at a crime scene if you knew it was down to you? Would anyone? Did Christie? No. You have to understand, I am not a good person. I don't think I'm an evil person but I'm being as honest as possible when I say that the jury's still out on that one. I didn't intend to cause harm, I didn't want people to get hurt but my motives were boredom and the fiscal reward and for god's sake, him- why do you know him if you think he's easy to resist?
-I never said that. I know what he's-
-Yes, exactly. And this is what I'm like- I had nothing to live for. Fuck, I probably have even less now. That night, after he broke into my house, I found his card-
-'You're welcome', right?
-Yes, that. I did gather that it was probably mass-produced. You've had them in the past?
-Hang on...you didn't...
-What, I didn't what?
-Did you...were you at any point romantically involved with Christie?
At this point she looks me up and down, inspecting my appearance, as if registering my exterior fully for the first time. I suppose the situation didn't allow for her observance, it kind of makes me feel guilty for my own neurotic assessment of every notable characteristic of every person on the scene. I can't help the fact that I'm unused to being affected by things. I can't help the fact that I've learnt how to pick apart every single aspect of my surroundings, animal, mineral, plant- until they're stripped of all but their essence, telling me only what I need to know and nothing else- oh god, I've been taught enough humanity in the last fifteen minutes to understand that this is what panicking sounds like. I can't remember the question.
-What?
-Did you sleep with him?
Her voice is frustrated. I was obviously vacant for longer than I thought, I can only imagine the absurdity of the facial expressions I must have been pulling. She spoke again, I register- oh. Oh wow. That just...I'd just erased it from my mind, and now it comes back, stronger than anything, so strange...when I open my mouth my voice sounds oddly disembodied, like I'm not controlling it, like I'm not thinking for myself.
-Yes...yes, I did...how...
-Business card.
-Oh now that is just...that is just wrong. That is truly, truly terrible- bloody hell, of all the tasteless, conceited things anyone could ever...business cards?
Shirley's expression goes from the looks of disgust I share with her to manically amused. I have to admit, I am too- it's just too strange. It's just too strange and too funny that this person exists, and he has disappeared like some kind of secret agent. Like the criminal he just yearns to be. Ridiculous.
-So where would you say he is now?
-At a guess, I'd say he's watching all of this unfold. Knowing Christie, he's a proper...voyeur. He wouldn't miss this for the world.
-His arrogance dictates it, I assume. He is, afterall, currently in the position of the evil bloody genius having everyone asking questions around him, a perfect little circle trail for the police to follow while he makes his dramatic exit...god, I didn't realise people like this existed.
-They don't. It's just him.
-I mean...and explosion? Really? Intending to kill at least Anton and Cassie, then god knows how many more...you really had no idea?
She sighs in annoyance.
-No, I had no idea. One thing though...I don't think he did intend to kill them. For some reason this looks less like an attempted murder and more like a point to prove. Look at the weakness of the explosion. Look at the fact that Cassie had already been upstairs, conscious, for some time. He didn't exactly torture her, and he didn't appear to have tried to kill her. This makes me think it's more of a message. And you never said, what did he tell you to say, what where his exact words?
I think back, but it's not an easy thing to forget, his breath on my cheek in the doorway of the dark staircase, his hand claiming unreasonable ownership of my shoulder and his voice dripping with self-satisfaction and arrogance.
-He said, 'tell the boy it was Gabriel, the one in black.' When I asked what, he said 'everything'. In all fairness, I didn't lie purposefully.
The bitterness returns to her face as she raises an eyebrow at my feeble defence.
-What would you call it then, is it labelled something else on your clearly excellent scale of moral reasoning?
-No, I mean, for a second I thought it was Gabriel. I was in shock, Christie wasn't there- when I heard Cassie crying up the stairs he rushed past me without telling me what was going on, he left me in a room with a beaten-up girl lying on the floor, what other conclusion could I have drawn?
-And it didn't occur to you that Christopher has supposedly already given you this information?
-No, it didn't. I don't think he'd wanted me to go in there in the first place, I'm not sure he wanted me to find Cassie at all, in fact- he specifically asked me to only wait just inside the building so I could run out when Yves got there. I get the feeling he didn't expect Gabriel to be in the building already. There was all that time when he was with me, early this morning. I don't think he slept, but there was plenty of time when he wasn't at the building. What's significant about this place anyway, or is he just drawn to abandoned houses where strange things don't get questioned by the police?
-This is where Gabriel works.
Oh. Oh.
-And he tried to blow it up...
-No. He didn't try, he succeeded. He didn't mean to blow it up, he meant to damage it enough to send a message.
-You sound like you're reading a little more into this than I am. What message?
-You don't know anything about him outside of the days you've known him?
-Nothing, he never told me anything.
-He likes to own things. He likes to collect things. For a long time, Gabriel was his property. It was obvious to everyone else, he was pretty unfeeling about it all but Gabriel never left him. He never displayed much affection but he was unmistakeably in control of the poor guy. A month ago is when Yves came along, becoming the deciding factor in Gabriel's attempt to separate himself from Christie. Christie is a hard person to separate yourself from. Now I'm thinking Christie is pretty annoyed that Gabriel somehow succeeded in doing that.
-So he made me try and break them up by telling Yves that Gabriel attacked Cassie. That's pretty feeble.
-On its own, it's pretty feeble. With the other stuff...
-There's other stuff?
-It doesn't really concern you...
-Actually, I think it probably does.
-You don't understand though.
-I might do if you explain it to me? I'm actually quite intelligent, contrary to popular belief.
-As am I, so it shouldn't surprise you that it didn't slip my notice that you were. Anyway, look. Last night when he went out he found Yves. He drugged him and...did things...that I'm probably not at liberty to tell you about.
-He got Yves to cheat on Gabriel by drugging him.
-Yes. That exactly. And then there's the explosion...
-With Anton inside...why was Anton inside?
-That's something I don't know. I think we've got to ask him that ourselves.
Fortunately, we're at the bottom of the wide hospital driveway. Comfortingly close to some answers.